Crocodile Shoes

Ouch the Crocodile had very sensitive feet. In the water, he was fine, but as soon as he walked out on land, the stones were all poky and the twigs were all prickly and he said, “Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!” all the time.    

Ouch was not a wild and grabby croc. He liked to keep his finger and toenails looking neat and civilised. But out in the jungle there wasn’t a person for miles to do a croc pedicure. Ouch was cross.

 “It’s all the zoo’s fault,” he said, “If they hadn’t taken me out of my cosy home and thrown me back into the wild, I’d be happy, drinking pineapple shakes and having my nails done by Lila, the zookeeper’s daughter.” 

Ouch’s breakfast, lunch and supper was strictly vegetarian. He really disappointed his parents who loved their meat, especially if it was still moving.

Ouch loved fruit salad with paw-paws and oranges, washed down with coconut milk.

            “There could be another answer you know,” said Harold, the hippo.

Harold had also been relocated to the wild from a zoo and he was rubbing coconut oil all over his belly so that it wouldn’t burn pink in the sun.    

 “I need a hat,” Harold had said every day, until Germaine Giraffe, picked some leaves off the tallest trees and made him one.

Harold was only really happy when he was under the coolest water of the deepest pool, with only his nose and eyes peeping out.

“What is your answer?” Ouch asked, picking up his foot and plucking out a large thorn, ‘I’m thinking of running home.”

“Oh no,” Harold snorted, “They’d only make you into a handbag, or belt, or an ugly pair of shoes.”

“Ugly!” Ouch was very indignant, “I would make a fine pair of shoes!”

“Well,” Harold said, floating on his back, “You will have to make your own shoes and gloves. Then you won’t get hurt.”

Ouch thought about this for a while, so that several tickbirds came and sat on his nose.

“I’m very hygienic!” he said as they squawked angrily.

“What kind of shoes? What can I make them from?” Ouch said.

“What about people,” Harold said.

“I’m not going to make shoes out of a person?” Ouch squeaked.

“Why not?” said Harold, “they make them out of you.”

 “Guess what?” Germaine Giraffe said, dipping his long neck down to the watering hole. “There’s a human having a nap over there, under that tree and he’s taken off his shoes and gloves.”

Ouch and Harold jumped out of the water in surprise and crept up for a closer look.

Germaine said, “I think it is one of the game rangers - the ones who are supposed to keep an eye on us? He obviously feels very safe here, hat over his eyes and ….”

“…shoes off!” Ouch said triumphantly. “Oh, if only they would fit my large, fat feet and my chubby hands, I would be so happy, you could change my name to, Yay!”

Elbert the dassie went to measure the items. He was very quick. He snuck there and back so fast, that the other animals were still looking into the distance when he sprang up at their feet, nose whiffling.

“The shoe is an amazing size 16,” he said, “And the gloves look quite inhuman to me.”

“I must have them!” Ouch said excitedly, “How can I hold my head high without my exclusive Game Ranger shoes and gloves?”

They all agreed they would have to call on the baboons for help.

Kool, a young baboon, was the hero of the moment. He scampered across to the human, grabbed the items with great speed and nearly got caught when he tried to steal the socks!

The other animals held their breaths in horror! But the man only yawned and turned over. So Kool chuckled and scampered back with the goodies for Ouch.

The animals went back to the waterhole. Then Ouch tried on the shoes. He gave a huge sigh.

“Aaaaaaah! What comfort,” he said. Then he tried on the gloves. “This is better,” he crooned, “My delicate hands and nails will not be ruined by too much sun and water and lack of calcium.”

The animals were all pleased. Their days were no longer disturbed by shouts of, “Ouch! Ouch!”

Instead they were lulled to sleep by the crooning croc as he waddled off to bed.

“You can call me Mr Mmmmmmm now,” he said happily, “Good night!”